About Jeez-Its

At Jeez-Its, we believe Communion is a slap in the face to the Body of Christ and its infinite potential. After obtaining a bounty of transubstantiated communion wafers from an anonymous priest, we decided it was time to see just what these baby Jesuses could do. Join as we prove that Jesus can do anything and everything, even as a cracker.

Jeez-Its are made with bits of real Jesus!

Thursday, May 13, 2010

The Greeks Should Have Totally Seen This Coming

We all know that God controls the universe and holds a high stake in the comings and goings of the people on Earth. And he seems particularly concerned with the comings. Which is why the Greeks should have totally seen the collapse of their economy approaching.

The Greeks have a lot that they can be proud of. They invented democracy, western philosophy, political science, Tiffany Amber-Thiessen and the Olympic Games. They developed profound literature, mathematical principles, and the dramatic arts. But perhaps one Greek invention above all others caught God’s eye – butt sex.

Yes, the Greeks are known for their appreciation of the anal arts, and God has never been a fan. Being the clever, patient, and omnipotent being that He is, God has waited until now to unleash His vengeance on the Greek people. The Roman Conquering, earthquakes, volcanic eruptions, no previous tragedy has hurt those lascivious Greeks more than cutting their social programs. God has brought them to their knees, clamoring to please Him.

The rest of the world must take note! Thousands of years are only minutes to God. He can wait to wreak his wrath on you. Hundreds, possibly thousands, of years may go by, until everyone has forgotten about how the non-procreative sex they have been having makes God hot under the collar, and then He will strike with economic disaster.

Beware, all ye who like the butt sex. Beware, because God will not hesitate to fuck you like you've never been fucked before. By taking away your social programs.


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